


Whatever You Want

by kransp



Series: What Are We Doing Here? [1]
Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Drunk Sex, F/M, Morning After, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-01
Updated: 2019-06-01
Packaged: 2020-04-05 17:29:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19045069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kransp/pseuds/kransp
Summary: I wanted an old school Mer hook up...Jo and Alex plan their own wedding... The next morning Meredith wakes up to realize she can't remember who she hooked up with the night before.Title inspired by his first line of season 15, the scene so damn hot it made me wish she had just hooked up with him then.Not nearly as over the top crazy as my other story.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I started this around 8pm last night with just a note around how I wanted it to start... And the realization that it actually needed to start the next morning... so basically what little of an idea I started with this has been written from the ground up... fun times... it took me about 8 1/2 hours... I've been writing all night (with short breaks to check details on the early part of the season)
> 
> I need sleep... 
> 
> This was supposed to be like... 1 maybe 2 chapters long... hahahahahahahahahahahahaha
> 
> This is complete for now, but I have already started mentally outlining a sequel

The slam of her front door wakes Meredith up. The sound of her kids drift up the stairs. They sound happy, excited about something. _Why is the world so loud_? She pulls a pillow over her head to muffle the noise and then realizes that it just makes the sound of her blood pounding in her head worse. _Fuck_. She sits up too quickly and regrets it immediately. The sunshine filling her room is far too bright and she needs to hurl.

Afterwards she sits on the cold tile next to the toilet berating herself for drinking so much last night. She doesn't do that any more for a reason. _Never again._ She has made that promise before. Eventually her stomach settles enough to think about standing, and her head clears enough to take notice of anything but itself. _Fuck_.

Her whole body is screaming 'hook up' at her. She looks in the mirror. _Definitely sex hair_. Her head might still hurt, but damn her body is still singing _. At least it wasn't a total waste_.

It's been a couple years since she's gotten drunk enough to give herself a monster hangover, but it's been over a decade since she had a drunken hook up. _Shit_. She wracks her brain trying to remember who she would possibly have slept with. Her eyes widen with the realization that not only can she not remember, but he could still be in her house.

She steps back into her bedroom and for the first time notices a bottle of water and aspirin on her nightstand. _At least he's more considerate than Drunk Meredith ever is_. She swallows a couple pills and downs half the bottle of water. She sees a note, hopefully he signed it. The writing is familiar, though she can't quite place it.

'Last night was amazing. I have a shift. Call me?' 

She sighs. _Too much to ask for_. 

She takes inventory of what she does know while she gets dressed: 

_1) He definitely has a beard_. The roughness of it is still written on her skin. Vague flashes of the delicious drag of whiskers against her neck, her breasts, her stomach, and thighs has her pulse racing a bit. She has a type, and would be more shocked if he didn't have facial hair. _That cute bartender had facial hair_.

_2) He was at the wedding. Probably_. She remembers the wedding itself. She remembers giving Amelia her keys. Then there were shots. _Dumb ass_. Talking to Maggie and Arizona at the bar... She sighs. She probably came straight back here. She can't imagine going anywhere else... If she was drunk enough to not remember by the time she left the reception she knows Joe wouldn't serve her. She could have theoretically called someone. _Would that be better_? She can't imagine who in her contacts would have answered that call. She would like to believe her partner had also been drinking to think hooking up with someone who was drinking was a good idea. 

_3) I know him_. Between the familiarity of the handwriting and his assumption that she has his phone number she must. _Probably not the bartender then_. Which will make figuring out who it is a lot easier. _What if he's totally inappropriate? If I don't know it won't be awkward right? Except he woke up here. He knows who I am_.

_4) He probably works at the hospital_. He said he had a shift, and while a lot of people 'have shifts', almost everyone at the wedding works at the hospital. Which means he's there somewhere now. Where she is supposed to be in less than an hour. _Fuck_. If she could figure it out ahead of time maybe it would feel less like there was a ticking time bomb waiting for her at the hospital. _Call out_. She shakes her head. At least she knows he's there today. If she calls out she won't know who is actually there. Maybe seeing him will trigger her memory.

She digs her shoes out from under her bed and slips them on. The kids are eating breakfast and Amelia has made coffee "Thanks" Meredith pours herself a cup and then fills her travel mug. 

"Rough night?" Amelia asks raising her eyebrow. 

"Mmhmm" Meredith makes a noise of agreement and drinks some of the coffee before asking "What time did you leave last night?" 

"I left around 9. Betty called and needed me" 

"Oh..." Meredith takes another long swig of coffee.

"You and Maggie were doing shots when I left" Amelia answers the question she hadn't wanted to ask "You uh- called me around 9:40, you said you were going to grab a cab so I didn't have to wait for you"

"I didn't... by any chance mention I was sharing a cab did I?" Meredith tries to make her question sound casual, but she can tell Amelia sees right through her.

"No... but maybe Maggie knows something?"

"Yeah... maybe..."

"We can call Maggie on the way to work" Amelia suggests.

"We?"

"Uh- yeah? When you gave me the keys yesterday you asked if I would pick up the kids and then carpool" Amelia reminds her.

"Yeah, of course. I just have a major headache... Maybe you can drive?"


	2. Chapter 2

Maggie doesn't answer her phone.

"So was the mystery man any good?" Amelia asks.

Meredith considers lying, but Amelia is smarter than that "Yeah"

"Good? Or _good_ "? Amelia asks.

Meredith leans her head back and closes her eyes and is thankful she doesn't have to drive "I have no idea who the hell I went home with last night. I have minimal information to go off of and I was drunk"

Amelia snorts "That's not an answer"

Another series of flashes comes to her causing her heart to race a bit. Running her hands through his hair as he went down on her. His breath-

"Earth to Meredith" Amelia cuts in and the images dissipate and her headache reasserts itself.

"Fine, even with the hangover it was worth it... I'm just hoping he's not too inappropriate, it's been too long since I've gotten laid and-" Meredith opens one eye "Why are we here?" she asks confused.

"We're here-" Amelia indicates the unfamiliar grocery store "because they have a pharmacy not associated with the hospital. I thought maybe considering you don't seem to remember anything, you might want to be on the safe side?"

Meredith curses "Yeah..."

 _5) He has dark hair_. She contemplates the bartender again before remembering she already ruled him out. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours later she's paged for a consult in the pit. She's finishing up talking to the patient, Cece, when she senses him behind her. She knows without looking it's him. _Please be appropriate_. She prays to herself. 

"Dr. Grey?" she knows that voice.

Cursing to herself, lying to herself, telling herself maybe she's wrong. She turns and DeLuca smiles and her and she's lost in his eyes.

_6) He has gorgeous eyes._

A whole lot more flashes hit her then and she closes her eyes as memories of his hands brushing against her skin nearly cause her to moan out loud in front of the patient.

"Dr. DeLuca!" her voice is far too high pitched and he looks at her funny.

"I just wanted to make sure you got my note" he explains "I hope you didn't think I was sn-"

"No" she interrupts him "I mean, yes, I got the note. I will have to uh- I will get back to you about that later" she glares at him daring him to say anything else right now.

"Okay. I- uh- look forward to hearing back from you then" he gives her one last lingering gaze before heading off to surgery.

"Well aren't you lucky?" Cece observes.

"That wasn't- I'm not- We don't" Meredith sputters.

"You don't have to be ashamed" Cece assures her.

"I am his teacher, and his boss, and his ex-girlfriend's sister so yes, I really do" Meredith sighs "And I don't know why I said any of that"

"Child none of those things matter if you really like someone" 

"I don't- I barely- We were drunk" Meredith protests "As I was saying, we need to run some tests and then we should have a better idea of what caused you to pass out"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

She checks the OR board and sees he is in surgery with Richard. She checks the time and knows she should have a couple hours before he's out. She hasn't seen Maggie yet and she isn't on the board. She's torn between wanting to talk to Maggie immediately and avoiding the conversation as long as she can. She still hasn't got a total lock on last night, but she doesn't need to play detective anymore anyway. Deciding to lay down for a few minutes as she's still tired _because of all the sex_ she groans at her inner monologue. She decides to lock the door so she can't be disturbed by interns, or Maggie, or whichever couple couldn't keep their hands to themselves this week. She realizes her mistake a second later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I figure there's a couple things other than DeLuca that would have saved Jackson and Maggie from the crash (a) I don't think without the April/Matthew wedding stuff Jackson would have been in the same head space and walking would be less likely and (b) if they didn't wait for DeLuca to get functional they could have gone out the door sooner, even just a few seconds and they'd have been on the other side.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is where it gets smutty.

Between her headache and being distracted she hadn't seen him before she locked the door.

It had been a long night and she wasn't the only one who had missed out on sleep last night. After they had lost the patient Andrew had gone to try to catch up on some sleep. As exhausted as he is, he still hears the door shut and lock and he's sitting up in an instant because he's made the mistake of ignoring the sound of the lock before and been caught in an extremely awkward situation. He has found the best policy is to make sure that they know someone is in the room before clothes start coming off. 

When he realizes who it is he is off the bunk and kissing her. One hand in back of her head, holding her close and providing at least a minimal cushion from the door. The other hand on her hip, just under the edge of her top. She is acutely aware of each of his fingers against her skin. He kisses the side of her neck and deliberately scrapes the sensitive skin with his chin, eliciting a moan of delight, as he makes his way to suck on her earlobe. Something he had discovered made her crazy last night.

 _This isn't why I came in here, but-_. One hand on his chest, and one slipped into the back of his pants, fingers gripping him, encouraging him to grind into her. When he moves to her earlobe she finally gets out a coherent thought "Please tell me you didn't just come in here?" her voice is ragged.

He glances down at his watch "About 20 minutes ago" he whispers.

 _Long enough that hopefully nobody will think I followed him_. She nods and pulls the shirt off of him "This-" she kisses him this time "-still counts as last night" she tells him while pulling off her own top. 

He licks her collarbone as he undoes the clasp on her bra "Meredith?" 

"I don't re- oooohhhhh" his tongue on her nipple makes her lose her train of thought. He kisses his way down her stomach and starts to tug off her pants "I don't remember much from last night. If this is a bad idea or Maggie is pissed at me or whatever, I want it to be for something I remember clearly" she finishes explaining.

He licks and nips gently at her thigh causing her to moan again. He chuckles softly against her skin at her concern. He might have had a couple more drinks than he should have but he remembers the night before fairly well. From Maggie yelling as she went out the door, to Meredith biting her lip and giving him that look, to the sounds she made as she came for the third time. Even if her logic made sense he doesn't need a do over, but he will take it. Give her what she clearly needs and enjoy the hell out of it. He grazes her clit through her panties. They're drenched and he wonders if he can get away with stealing them.

Her hands wrap into his hair as he pulls the panties off her. His mouth finding her center again and teasing her until she comes apart, her howl muffled by the back of her hand. She tugs gently on his hair with the hand still wrapped in it. Guiding him up. "Do you have a condom?" she asks.

"No" he admits "but we didn't last night either. I'm clean, and you told me you are on the pill" 

"I am" she confirms "but I like the backup"

He groans "Next time?" he offers.

 _If there is a next time_. She nods and pushes down his pants and boxers and he kicks them off. His mouth finds hers again as he slides into her.

 _7) He certainly knows how to satisfy_.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"We really shouldn't be doing this" she points out as she pulls her top back on.

"No on call rooms?" he grins at her.

"Stop that"

"Stop what?" he asks confused.

"Grinning like you've fucked me in an on call room" she clarifies "No. I meant any of this. I'm your teacher and your boss"

"You've done this before" he points out.

"That doesn't make it a good idea!" she sighs frustrated "This isn't that"

"Isn't what?"

"It's not the start of our love story. This is me needing to get laid"

"Okay" he shrugs.

"I can't- okay?" she is the one confused now.

"Have I proven less than capable of the task so far?"

"I- well no, but-" she is at a loss for words.

"I am barely over my last relationship Meredith. If you're done with this that's fine. Or we can continue to... meet each others needs... for a while" he offers.

"I- think I need to think about this" 

"Sure" he says unlocking the door and heading back to work.

_What have I gotten myself into_


	4. Chapter 4

Meredith isn't sure if his idea is crazy or not. It sounds good on the surface, but she has doubts. _If I go along with this, we are going to need rules_. She texts Maggie, asking if they can talk. When Maggie gets there she is distracted.

"Maggie did you hear anything I just said?" Meredith asks frustrated.

"Huh? No, I'm sorry- I am distracted. I'll try to focus" Maggie apologizes.

"I had sex with DeLuca last night" she confesses again.

"You had- oh... OH!" Maggie's eyes get wide.

"I'm sorry, I was drunk and I don't know how it happened... and in the spirit of being totally honest... We had a second round in an on call room. If you're mad I wanted to at least remember it"

Maggie is a bit embarrassed to tell her this, but she feels like Meredith needs to know she isn't mad "DeLuca and I are ancient history. If you want to- I am not standing in your way... but okay- oh- uhhh- geeze... I may have... recommended him to you... last night"

"You what?"

"I was pretty drunk myself... I was at Loud Over-honest Maggie level... and uh... you mentioned that you needed to get laid"

"Of course I admitted that" Meredith shakes her head "Please tell me it was just to you?" 

"Uhh... no actually... we were drinking with Jackson and Arizona"

"Oh God" Meredith groans "Tell me they were as drunk as we were?"

"Not nearly, no. sorry" Maggie shakes her head "You then complained that you don't have time for dating and then he walked by... and I told you that you should, and I'm quoting myself here 'have sex with DeLuca, he's very talented' " Maggie hides her face in her hands.

Meredith bursts out laughing "Okay, well that is very true" 

"Yeah... that's when Jackson cut me off and we left... but not before I yelled at you halfway across the room that I was serious, and 'you should totally fuck DeLuca' " 

Meredith laughs even harder.

"This isn't funny! I can't believe I yelled that in front of all our friends!" Maggie looks mortified.

"I'm sorry, but it does make me feel a little better about the whole thing. I felt guilty all day!" 

After she calms down again Meredith tells Maggie about his suggestion "I don't know how I feel about it, but I am considering it... If it's not going to be weird for you"

"I really don't care. DeLuca's a good guy. I don't know how long you can make casual sex work with him... he gets attached easy and sometimes rushes into things where he shouldn't..." Maggie cautions her.

"Like with Jo"

"Yeah, and Bello" 

Meredith nods "It's a bad idea"

"No... just... be careful, with your heart and his"

_Rule 1) No getting attached_


	5. Chapter 5

_Rule 2) Condoms_ When she stops for gas on her way into work the next morning she decides to go in to pay rather than just paying at the pump like she usually does. She grabs a bag of chips in addition to the box so it's not like she just came in for them... Not that she couldn't, but for some idiotic reason it feels more casual _Why am I acting like an embarrassed teenager_? She still gets the chips.

 _Rule 3) No sex at work_ Just because she tucked a couple in her bag doesn't mean that anything is going to happen here. She just wants them with her in case they're somewhere else that sex is an option _Like a date_? She shakes her head, that's not what this is.

She doesn't even see him that day. _It doesn't matter. Even if we do this... Casual does not start with obsessing over his location_. By the next morning she has talked herself out of it again. Until he pulls up on his motorcycle...

 _Rule 4) I am not getting on that thing_. He takes off his helmet and smiles at her. _Rule 4) I am not going anywhere on that thing_.

"Are you still thinking about..." Maggie nudges her with her elbow and raises her eyebrows.

"Wait what?" Amelia turns her jaw dropping "DeLuca?"

"Yeah" Meredith confirms.

"So-good-it-was-worth-a-hangover is DeLuca?!"

"Amelia!" Meredith scolds her "If you were a little louder they'd hear you in Oregon!"

"Sorry! but DeLuca?" 

Maggie grabs Amelia's arm and drags her away leaving Meredith to follow, or stop to talk to him as she sees fit.

"Nice bike" she offers.

He grins "Worth the hangover?"

"Shut up" she tries not to grin back.

"Do you want to go for a ride?" he offers.

"No. That's one of the rules" the second the words pop out she wants to swallow them back. She hadn't even fully decided yet _Liar_ and now he is grinning again.

"Rules huh?" 

"I mean if- yeah" she is trying not to blush at his intense gaze.

"So what are these... rules?" he asks.

"I don't- I haven't figured them all out yet" she tells him "I am still not sure this is a good idea"

"Listen, I get it if you don't want to do this"

"It's not that I don't want to. I just think it might not be the best idea"

"Okay. If you decide it's a better idea than you thought you should text me that list" and because the only rule she has told him is about the motorcycle, even if he knows it's going on the list, he leans in and kisses her. Just long enough to want to continue, but not so long that she has a chance to come to her senses. He's across the road before she does, and not quite in the building yet when his phone buzzes. He pulls it out to read her text [Rule 1...]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this is not only my first attempt at smut, it's also the first non-angst, non-baby fic... In the last 2 weeks I have written not just the longest thing I have ever written, it's probably longer than EVERYTHING ELSE combined... and updated Waking Up, something I never thought I would do again, not once, not twice, but three freaking times, it's a drabble collection, but still... and written out most of the details to the first follow up to Pieces of a Whole... And now this... I am insane right now... I don't even know who I am anymore... Apparently 39 year old me likes to write (two weeks ago when I posted the first chapter of PoaW it was my birthday)


End file.
